Happy Fourth of July (for whatever it's worth these days)!! It’s a bit annoying to note that we’re celebrating the downfall of a George who has been dead for two centuries, while living under the de facto rule of another George who is doing much more to offend us than just taxing tea and stamps. Instead of quartering soldiers, he’s sending them out to wreak havoc elsewhere. Instead of settling for having us hate him, he’s making the rest of the world hate us. Say goodbye to Roe v. Wade, any hope of gay marriage, and separation of church and state, because present-day George wants to turn the Supreme Court into a party-line assembly of Scalias and Thomases. Who needs education, health care, and a stable economy when you can have so much more fun ruining international relations and wrecking the environment? There’s a reason I semi-facetiously titled my Fourth of July mass-mail “American Refugee Pride Day.”
Speaking of the Fourth of July, I was in the grocery store over the weekend, and came across a display case for Swiss National Day party supplies, which included fireworks and flags and so on (Swiss National Day comes about a month after the Fourth of July, so it’s convenient that they like to prepare in advance). Fireworks can be hard to come by in the US, as they are illegal in many states, but when you do buy them, you can usually tell what it is that you’re buying, as they have instructions or pictures. Here, on the other hand, you can get your fireworks at the grocery store, and once you’ve bought them, you have no idea what any of the fireworks (if that is indeed what they are) are supposed to do. In a huge snub to tort law and product liability, the Swiss package their fireworks in generic boxes with pictures of happy children celebrating. No big warnings or disclaimers, no instructions or suggestions, no pictograms or explanations. I’m guessing that you just light them and hope for the best. Are you supposed to put them on the ground? Hold them? Throw them? Only one way to find out. Got matches?
Not only can you buy fireworks at the grocery store, you also go there to get clothes, houseplants, Swiss Army knives, government-issue trash bags, and other sundry items. In fact, a few weeks ago, I was accosted by a store representative asking me to take a written survey in German, in exchange for a free chocolate bar. Obviously, I took it. I like chocolate. They asked me to compare the store’s produce and meat with that of their competitors. Sure. Location, price, selection, all things you would expect to be asked about. But they also asked me where I preferred to buy my clothing and, if not at the grocery store, then where and why. I have a feeling that certain people buy their clothes at the grocery store, and others don’t, and that there is little you can do to make people switch. Personal opinion, but I think that their marketing and research money would be better spent trying to get a bigger share of the food market, as I don’t anticipate adding pants or sweaters to my grocery list any time soon.
Anyways, I got my Swiss driver’s license in the mail last week (they mail it to you about a week or two after you go to the Swiss DMV, not wanting or being able to give you the license on the spot). It has holograms, photo, and date of birth, as you would expect, but no address or expiration date. I’m assuming that they don’t put an address on there because the license is good for life, and the address is unlikely to stay the same forever (but then again, is a picture of my 26-year-old self going to be all that useful when I’m 70?) The license also came with a letter from the Swiss DMV, with standard information about the newly issued license, as well as a paragraph about the credit-card-size format. Until just a few years ago, Swiss (and other European) driver’s licenses were large pieces of stiff paper with a signature and photo. I’m assuming that they were easy to fake, and that they did not withstand being put in wallets or washing machines very well. And so the DMV’s letter very proudly pointed out that the “new” licenses are durable, portable, convenient, and modern. I had no idea that wallet-sized, plastic driver’s licenses were considered such a recent and revolutionary advance in ID technology.
I’m trying to get my act together for my upcoming dive trip. I’ll be flying to London, catching a charter flight down to Egypt from a different London airport, spending a week on a boat, and then doing the whole thing in reverse. It’s not an insignificant feat to navigate myself, a carry-on of regulators, a suitcase of camera gear, and a body bag of dive gear through four airports and four flights, but I’m hoping to make it there and back with sanity intact. One thing that will help is that the Swiss, blissfully confident that terrorists will not attack, invite passengers to bring their bags to the airport one day early, pick seats, and leave their luggage. Even stranger, for about $15 per bag, you can take your baggage to the train station, give them your information, and leave your bags. They take the bags to the airport and load them on the plane for you. Seems a bit lax for a country that is so paranoid as to rig the bridges and tunnels to self-destruct, require all able-bodied males to serve in the military, and build enough bomb shelters for every man, woman, and child.
So. I’m off to go shark hunting in Egypt, so I’ll be on hiatus, and back with some great stories (definitely) and pictures (hopefully) in two weeks.
Speaking of the Fourth of July, I was in the grocery store over the weekend, and came across a display case for Swiss National Day party supplies, which included fireworks and flags and so on (Swiss National Day comes about a month after the Fourth of July, so it’s convenient that they like to prepare in advance). Fireworks can be hard to come by in the US, as they are illegal in many states, but when you do buy them, you can usually tell what it is that you’re buying, as they have instructions or pictures. Here, on the other hand, you can get your fireworks at the grocery store, and once you’ve bought them, you have no idea what any of the fireworks (if that is indeed what they are) are supposed to do. In a huge snub to tort law and product liability, the Swiss package their fireworks in generic boxes with pictures of happy children celebrating. No big warnings or disclaimers, no instructions or suggestions, no pictograms or explanations. I’m guessing that you just light them and hope for the best. Are you supposed to put them on the ground? Hold them? Throw them? Only one way to find out. Got matches?
Not only can you buy fireworks at the grocery store, you also go there to get clothes, houseplants, Swiss Army knives, government-issue trash bags, and other sundry items. In fact, a few weeks ago, I was accosted by a store representative asking me to take a written survey in German, in exchange for a free chocolate bar. Obviously, I took it. I like chocolate. They asked me to compare the store’s produce and meat with that of their competitors. Sure. Location, price, selection, all things you would expect to be asked about. But they also asked me where I preferred to buy my clothing and, if not at the grocery store, then where and why. I have a feeling that certain people buy their clothes at the grocery store, and others don’t, and that there is little you can do to make people switch. Personal opinion, but I think that their marketing and research money would be better spent trying to get a bigger share of the food market, as I don’t anticipate adding pants or sweaters to my grocery list any time soon.
Anyways, I got my Swiss driver’s license in the mail last week (they mail it to you about a week or two after you go to the Swiss DMV, not wanting or being able to give you the license on the spot). It has holograms, photo, and date of birth, as you would expect, but no address or expiration date. I’m assuming that they don’t put an address on there because the license is good for life, and the address is unlikely to stay the same forever (but then again, is a picture of my 26-year-old self going to be all that useful when I’m 70?) The license also came with a letter from the Swiss DMV, with standard information about the newly issued license, as well as a paragraph about the credit-card-size format. Until just a few years ago, Swiss (and other European) driver’s licenses were large pieces of stiff paper with a signature and photo. I’m assuming that they were easy to fake, and that they did not withstand being put in wallets or washing machines very well. And so the DMV’s letter very proudly pointed out that the “new” licenses are durable, portable, convenient, and modern. I had no idea that wallet-sized, plastic driver’s licenses were considered such a recent and revolutionary advance in ID technology.
I’m trying to get my act together for my upcoming dive trip. I’ll be flying to London, catching a charter flight down to Egypt from a different London airport, spending a week on a boat, and then doing the whole thing in reverse. It’s not an insignificant feat to navigate myself, a carry-on of regulators, a suitcase of camera gear, and a body bag of dive gear through four airports and four flights, but I’m hoping to make it there and back with sanity intact. One thing that will help is that the Swiss, blissfully confident that terrorists will not attack, invite passengers to bring their bags to the airport one day early, pick seats, and leave their luggage. Even stranger, for about $15 per bag, you can take your baggage to the train station, give them your information, and leave your bags. They take the bags to the airport and load them on the plane for you. Seems a bit lax for a country that is so paranoid as to rig the bridges and tunnels to self-destruct, require all able-bodied males to serve in the military, and build enough bomb shelters for every man, woman, and child.
So. I’m off to go shark hunting in Egypt, so I’ll be on hiatus, and back with some great stories (definitely) and pictures (hopefully) in two weeks.
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