Tuesday, February 01, 2005

How to Pass for a Swiss Person, Part III, Section 6: Living in Switzerland; Language

Switzerland is a small country with a population of about 7 million people, spread out over an area about the size of New Jersey, Connecticut, and Delaware, (which rank 47th, 48th, and 49th out of the 50 states, when it comes to size). In this small country, there are four official languages spoken (German, French, Italian, and Romansch), and several unofficial languages, (including Swiss German, which is the dominant language, despite not actually being an official language; English; and other smatterings here and there of other languages, as well.

Living here sometimes makes conversations feel like a giant game of Taboo, as people navigate around unknown words in conversations not held in their mother tongue: “I am looking for the place where you go to get things that are yours, but you do not have them anymore.” “The lost-and-found?” “Yes, and I have a map here that I made with the machine in my office.” “The printer?” “Exactly.”

Despite not having an official language that is uniquely their own, the Swiss are very keen on distinguishing between “us” and “them” when it comes to language. French spoken with a Parisian accent is seen as snobby, as is High German that is spoken using correct grammar and pronunciation. Swiss German is generally not taught to outsiders, and attempts to speak Swiss German are usually countered with English or High German. It sometimes leaves foreigners at a bit of a loss, since the Swiss will never include outsiders who speak the “wrong” languages, or who speak the “right” languages the “wrong” way, yet they also do not want to let outsiders in on their linguistic secrets.

So what does it sound like when people speak here, you ask? Well, the Swiss French speak a French that is quite comprehensible to non-Swiss (Assuming that said non-Swiss understand French), with some slang and other turns of phrase being region-specific. If only we had learned how to count using the Swiss system in high school French!! No more four-twenty-ten-seven, thank you, a simple ninety-seven will suffice here. Swiss German, on the other hand, is almost entirely impenetrable, even to fluent High German speakers. It has been described as “sing-song, “guttural,” or “something like Danish, maybe,” and I have also heard the comment that “somehow it has more consonants *and* more vowels than High German.” I prefer to make a simpler aural image: imagine the Swedish chef from the Muppets trying to hack up a hairball. (Note: the Swedish chef is one of my favourite Muppets, so that isn’t an entirely bad thing.)

No comments: